Saying Goodbye

One of the best reasons I can think of right now, not to go anywhere, is that it gets you out of saying good bye.  An alternative plan is just to sneak out when nobody is looking and hope no one notices.  Unfortunately, I like to go places and I like parties, so neither of these plans is really tenable and I will have to put up with saying good bye.  In Turkey this means lots of the double cheek kiss; not my favorite.

Saying goodbye started with the students.  

I had been wondering how to tell my students that I was leaving.  The first class I told was my L10 advanced class when we were talking about the chemistry of cooking.  One student suggested that I have a cooking chemistry club next year and I figured that was as good a time as any to tell them that any club I participated in would be far far away.  They were heartwarmingly saddened by the news but after we talked about it for a few minutes we could get back to chemistry.  I expected the news to travel to the other classes quickly, but I guess I overestimated my value as gossip material and the news never got back to me.  I told one student in my L10 intro class a few weeks later and by the end of the period, the info had only made it to the end of her row.  The other classes, I finally told during the last week, one class, not even until the last day.  A few kids had heard about it, but one said she thought it was a vicious rumor so ignored it.  (-:

Finals were announced to be optional just before school let out on the last Thursday of instruction.  Pandemonium ensued.  I was worried that no one would come to school on Friday and I would miss my chance to say good bye and take pictures, but oddly enough, more kids came to school on Friday because there was no finals than would have if there had been.  That is just how things go here.

Goodbye to my teacher cohort

This is last year's picture, but if you imagine Jack as Shirin, we look about the same. (-:

It occurs to me now that we didn't take a picture when my cohort met on the second Tuesday of final exam week.  This picture is from last year at Jack's farewell.  Jack wasn't here this year but Shirin joined us, so we were still six.  We ordered Bodrum Manti and at at Konak.  I had made a carrot cake for the event, knowing that it was a favorite, but I was going to hike up the hill with other stuff and go to yoga earlier in the afternoon, so I sent Marshal a text to ask if would get something out of my fridge and bring it up.  He said sure and since he was going to take a taxi up, it would be no problem.  I get to Konak after yoga and I don't see the cake.  Where's the cake? I ask.  That's a funny story, Marshall replies.  He and Shirin had gotten a ride up the hill with the guards and stopped at the bridge to pick up what they assumed was a cake, but the bridge didn't know anything about a cake.  Frustrated, Marshall figures I must have meant the bottom gate guards rather than the bridge guards and goes back to check his phone for the text, just to find that he misread 'fridge' as 'bridge' and it was he who messed up, not me.  We tried talking the Konak kids into walking down and picking it up for us, Gaby even negotiated 3TL each instead of the offered 2TL, but once the parents were involved the plan was defenestrated and we ended up coming down the hill to eat cake and hangout at Shirin's for a little while.  As we reflected, it was brought up that we are all kind to each other and don't talk over each other when we are together.  I had noticed this before and was glad that others had too, it is really nice to be with a group of people who listen to each other and can have a conversation rather than just needing a warm body to absorb the sound waves you need to produce.

I quietly said goodbye at the last fish dinner.

There was nobody I wasn't going to see again at the last fish dinner, so there was no real good bye, except perhaps to Mike who was leaving for Italy with students over the weekend.  I did say good by to the idea of fish dinner.  How amazing is it to get 10-20 people together every week for a grill out potluck.  The food is always good thanks to Lisa picking it up fresh and Alex's grill skills.  There is always a variety of things to eat, although we tended to get into habits, Maura brings nibbly things, Tom brings potatoes, Jack/Celeste brings some non-green salad and I bring dessert.  The company is always superb and you can't beat the view.  For our last night, we even got serenaded by Mike and Darcy!

Darcy and Mike singing old standards.

Nobody told me there was a picture, and I was too busy talking to Milo to notice until it was too late.

Then I said goodbye to my department.

On the Thursday that ended the finals grading week we had a professional development day and after that day of joy, the science department met for our end of the year celebration under the trees in front of Cinar.  Everyone brought snacks or beverages and I brought a lemon cheesecake to celebrate Ipek's birthday, the last of the year.  After everyone was assembled, Alison had nice words to say about how I would be missed (and not just for my cakes) and Ipek presented me with a shiny box of presents.  The department had debated on what I would like, and did really well selecting a locum serving dish, a Turkish cookbook, a book on Turkish desserts and a page from an old Ottoman book with a picture of an astrologist.  I was very touched, and even more so when I read the card that everyone had signed.  I was moved to speak, which is something I usually avoid, but I had to let the folks know that I have really enjoyed working with them and that there wasn't a single person in the bunch that I didn't like talking to between classes or at coffee time, something I can't say about another science department I have worked in.

Alison is caught in a sun beam in this picture, so I made us move and take it again.

The science department.  Thanks Kudret for taking the picture.

Salt chicken wasn't really about good bye, but it had a bit of that vibe.

Salt chicken was originally scheduled for the first Saturday night of the protests, but it was canceled because all of the buses were canceled.  It was a bit of trouble to reschedule it, and unfortunately some folks got left out, but we did have a full servis bus and a very good time.  The restaurant specializes in baking chicken and lamb in a salt crust so it is extra juicy and delicious when you open it up.  The mezes were also amazing and make sure you leave room for dessert.

I got to 'help' open up the salt crust on the chicken at Akdeniz Hatay Sofrasi. 

No goodbyes were said here, but there was an arm wrestle over me, which was very touching.  (I don't know that anyone has ever fought over me before.)  Maria won, which is a good thing, because I have already quit this job and have a plane ticket home and it would have been awkward to suddenly change those plans had Erin won.

The arm wrestle to determine if I stay (Erin) or if I go (Maria).  Maria won, so I guess I go.  (-:

The hardest time was Wednesday night at the faculty dinner.

Graduation was nice, the parade of dresses was elegant, but the faculty dinner was what I was looking forward to and dreading the most of the week.  It is very elegant, with white table cloths, real plates and silverware and unlimited beverages.  There are nuts and vegetables set up on tables with couches to nibble on before dinner is served.  When we approached, Maria asked how many times a year was the staff treated to this.  Twice I said, three times if you count the trustees reception, but I guess if you count Christmas, you could get to four.  We chatted with the usual crowd for a while and I had a visne with white wine, which is pretty tasty.  Anthony invited us to start eating and we wondered to the buffet tables and then to a dining table.  There were particular people I wanted to sit with and by elbowing some kids out of the way, we managed it.  I sat between Darcy and Maria, which was a really nice, safe place to be.  When most people were finished eating, Anthony started calling people up to be recognized for leaving the school.  He started with folks who had been there for one year, then me (2 years) then up.  Not many folks were leaving, 6 or 7, if I remember correctly, but everyone gets a silver plated (?) plate with their name and years of service.  It looks really nice and comes in a purple velour box, but I have packed mine now so I can't take a picture of it.  I think I was on my third glass of wine with cherry juice when the ending began.  I just sat and people started to come up to say goodbye.  I don't think there was ever an actual line, but I can imagine that people had their eye out and were mentally in line.  I would have been if the situation had been reversed.  In retrospect, I wish I had asked Maria to take a picture of me with each person as they came up, it would have been nice to have a picture with everyone, but I could barely keep my wits about me and remember the basic social graces.  In fact I am sure that I neglected many of them.  I was very touched by everyone who took the time to seek me out to wish me well or tell me they would miss me.  It was even worth the hugs and double cheek kisses, which are not my favorite, to make that last connection.  I was particularly surprised by one good bye.  A person with whom I had had a good working, but a rocky social relationship, went out of their way to say good bye and  ask for a hug and kiss. Thanks.  As several people have told me this week, it isn't just about me, and if the hug and kiss is important to the person I am leaving, I shouldn't begrudge them that, regardless of how uncomfortable it makes me feel.  I think this must be true and it makes that last interaction more meaningful if so.

Profiterole are the standard 'fancy' dessert favored by Bilal, the head cook at RC.  These were a cut above his usual.

The night ended earlier than I expected, it wasn't even fully dark when Maria and I wondered home, via Tom's back yard to take a picture.  I was a bit tipsy, with the wine and the emotion and I was very glad that Maria was there to offer support.  I did feel a bit like a rock star as so many people came up to talk with me, but that high just makes the low lower afterwards and I was glad I didn't have to go home alone.

Followed shortly by saying ttfn to the cat and Maria. 

Holding hands while she naps. 

Maria came to collect the cat as she was fond of telling people she met all over Turkey.  She has now convinced all sorts of people that this must be one great cat, if she came all this way just to bring her home.  She is a very good cat and I miss her already, but I am very glad that she is in good hands at summer camp, having made the airplane journey safely.  I will see her (and Maria) at the end of July, which isn't so long to wait and there have been many other cats here (including some very cute kittens that can almost walk) to keep me from missing her too much.

Pekka's journeywas more complicated that we expected.  For those of you thinking about taking your beast home, not only do you need a rabies shot, and a health certificate, you also need a paper signed and stamped by the government saying that the cat has a rabies shot and a health certificate.  Many thanks to Cenk who took an extra long lunch to drive us around in search of said document.

Then it was Keeley.

Keeley, the bum, didn't show up to the faculty dinner, he wrote me an email saying good bye, as if that was going to be good enough.  Thursday afternoon, I hiked up the hill for an iced tea and three games of tavla (of which Keeley won all three).  It is always good to chat with Keeley, we have the most interesting conversations, whether about the difference between ermine, ferrets, weasels and stoats, or the digestion of glucose vs cellulose in your body.

Then Lisa.

Çok zor.

On the boat of the prep students farewell.

Then the Collins-Downs family.

Larry, Lisa, Alex, Maya, Milo, Elijah

Amazingly patient and infinitely innovative yoga instructor, absolutely delicious fish griller, tireless board gamers, reasonable, thoughtful, nice human beings with pretty good kids as far as kids go.  Their house was my home away from home, not to mention barber shop (-:

Then my stuff.

You can read more about my stuff in the wrapping up blog, previously posted.  Suffice it to say, I had a lot of stuff and it is now gone.

Finally all the hangers on.

I have been telling people that I really said good bye on Wednesday and everything after that has been just out for drinks or ice cream or a walk.  Not everyone believes me and they still try to say good bye again.  I have been mostly over it since Wednesday, although walking home from church this morning I did get a little meloncoly to be walking those streets for the last time.

I started this post with a good reason not to go anywhere or do anything, but the upside of meeting people, especially people who like to travel and are from around the world is now I have lots of people to visit.  I hope for most of these folks, it isn't really good bye, but 'see you later,' 'until we meet again' and 'in a while crocodile.'